Animal lovers in Cincinnati and elsewhere are saddened by the death of Colossus, a truly beautiful (to judge by pics; I never saw him in person) and truly colossal gorilla in the Cincinnati Zoo. And the poor guy died during root canal surgery! If a hulk like Colossus can't withstand the barbaric dental invasions of his dentist, you can be sure I will cast a jaundiced eye on my dentist's future suggestions that I undergo any similar process. He was 500 pounds! (The gorilla, not my dentist.) But Colossus was also 40 years old, and reportedly had a heart attack under anesthesia. (According to Wikipedia, the longevity record for gorillas in captivity was set by a primate named Massa in the Philadelphia Zoo, who died at 54.)

(photo by J. Star)

Hundreds of kids who visited the zoo the day after Colossus died wrote farewell notes on a 5'-by-5' card. Reminiscences and virtual obits are springing up around the blogosphere:

Heart of Colossus fails

Colossus caption contest -- Jim Borgman of the Cincinnati Enquirer drew an affectionate cartoon of Colossus approaching the gates of heaven, and is soliciting captions in his comments field. Add yours! (My favorite has St. Peter saying, "If you've got poo to fling, fling it now," but maybe I'm not getting into the proper spirit.)

Like many classical institutions, the Ohio Ballet in Akron is struggling. After canceling performances in February (following a weak fall season), the company has again failed to meet its production budget and has canceled its April performances. I hate to see hit ... but I'm an unabashed classical fan and if I were less in the minority this sort of thing wouldn't be happening. I prefer orchestra concerts to dance concerts, and during the last two years the orchestra scene in mid-sized cities around the world has really fallen apart. Numerous second-tier and third-tier orchestras have bitten the dust. 

If there is one Ohio institution that will not succumb to modern cultural apathy, it is the Cleveland Orchestra, universally regarded as one of the finest orchestras in the world -- which, by the way, has just announced a fall tour of Europe. I grew up listening to records of the Cleveland Orchestra under the legendary George Szell, and heard the orchestra in Carnegie Hall during its farewell tour to then-departing music director Cristoph von Dohnanyi. Through the years, the group's astounding transparency and virtuosity have remained a hallmark.

But I digress. If you enjoy the classical arts, keep in mind the fate of the Ohio Ballet, and buy a ticket to a fine-arts concert, somewhere, this year.

There's a German dude named Roberto Vanetz (at least, he posts in German; his name sounds Italian) who posted a silent, Zen-like video of a drive down E. 9th Street in Cleveland. This thing has a meditative quality to it. Watching, I kept waiting for for the driver to start screaming, or the car to crash, or something. But no, it rolls on placidly, quietly, touring what must be described as one of the least remarkable streets anyone could ever highlight in a video. Here it is -- perfectly safe for work, though it might put you to sleep:

Roberto seems to have a thing for Cleveland. He's got this walking, rough-cut tour of the city, including a small fireworks display and a visit to a mall.

Sorry, Detroit. Maybe another superhero will adopt you. Spidey has chosen Cleveland over also-ran Detroit -- at least, for part of the shoot of Spider-Man 3 in April. The producers reportedly like the look and feel of the city, the cooperation of the mayor's office, and (I'm guessing here) the chance to see the Indians' home opener. Whatever the reasons, Clevelanders can look forward to identifying location shots when the movie starts its run in May, 2007.

The best news of all, for midwestern wannabe Hollywood types, is the casting call for extras. The beauty of Hollywood action movies set in major cities is the need for hundreds of regular folks -- looking like Brad Pitt is absolutely not required. Of course, if you do look like Brad Pitt, you can go to the head of the line. If you actually are Brad Pitt ... well, that's just pathetic.

Anyway, the Greater Cleveland Film Commission set up a submission process on its Web site, where you can offer a photo and a claim to future bragging rights as a crowd member. I've never been an extra, despite living near several film shoots in my life, but I understand the hours are long, the pay is minimal, and the brush with greatness is fleeting. Sounds like terrific fun!